Anybody raising an independent, strong-willed child? Let’s see, I can raise BOTH hands! I love my daughter very much, but sometimes her independence can beat my mom nerves to death, LOL! She definitely likes to run the show and will try to run YOU if you let her. When she started kindergarten my cousin’s exact words were, “Let us pray that she does not try to teach the class!” The funny part is, she always ends up being the student that the teacher designates to help the other students. HA!
She is smart, she is kind, and she is important! One thing that I love most about her is her desire to help others, although at times she can come off as a tad bit bossy. Her wisdom goes beyond her years and she can teach you a few things if you pay attention. In fact, God is constantly using her to teach me things about him.
In the picture above I was preparing her for her dance competition. That means hair in a bun, eyeshadow and lipstick applied (lipstick she cannot stand). This entire routine can be quite frustrating sometimes because she is SO busy. Getting her to stand still and focus long enough is like pulling teeth. Geeze!! She’d much rather do her own hair and her own make up, but she’s nine, so imagine how that would turn out.
As previously mentioned, she participates in dance competitions. She is a member of an amazing dance team and the dancers are constantly being pushed to perform beyond the normal expectation for whatever their age is. In order for them to reach their maximum potential though, the instructors have to help and correct them. And yeah, she cannot stand that either. She’s always prepared with a rebuttal or an explanation as to why she did something a certain way (HER WAY). I think she was a part of the Great Debaters in her past life. LOL!
Eventually she gets herself together though, but how much time and energy does she waste ignoring the correction and doing it wrong just to feel like she’s standing her ground? And it’s not always rebellion, sometimes she just doesn’t prefer to be helped and she just wants to figure it out on her own. I know I’m going to sound like my mother, but I don’t know how many times I have said to her, “if you would just let someone help you it would be a lot easier.” At the end of the day, when her team wins she loves it; the smile on her face says it all. I just wish she’d understand that it’s okay to receive help and correction in order to be the best that she can be.
Oh how much I learn from being her mom! My name is Kendra – and I too am independent and strong-willed. I can’t help it; I just don’t like to ask for help. And on the flip side, if you offer me your help sometimes I may still want to do it my way (yeah, I know, but I did just confess that I’m strong-willed and independent).
The truth is, nobody likes to fail and nobody likes to come up short. We don’t like to appear weak or seem helpless. Many of us truly put our best foot forward only for it to seem like we’ve been pushed several steps back in the end. Sometimes we just fear asking for help or maybe we just don’t know how.
Listen, here is a super fact, WE ARE NOT SUPERHUMAN!! While
God created us to be fearfully and wonderfully made, he did not create us to be flawless and perfect. God designed us with blemishes so that we will lean on him in our imperfection. We were not meant to be self-reliant or dependent on our own strength. So again (sounding like my mother), if you would just let God help you things would be a lot easier.
I’ll admit, there are just some things that I need God’s help with. I mean, EVERYDAY I need God’s help. I can be impatient. Sometimes I don’t like being around people, and it shows. A lot of times I procrastinate. I hesitate to do the things that he’s asked of me because I don’t know how to begin. Sometimes I’m just winging it at being a mom and I feel like I’m failing. I’ll write an entire blog and then delete it because I don’t think anyone will read it. I overextend my budget at times and I struggle with tithing. I make mistakes everyday and it really eats me up on the inside.
Here’s what’s great – I am not without help! I have access to a God who waits for me to ask. “Ask and it shall be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be open.” Matthew 7:7
As I take my imperfections to God – all of the things that I struggle with and all of the things that make me feel helpless, he helps me! He corrects me. He redirects me. He guides me. He helps me with his grace – unmerited favor. I don’t have to reject it. I don’t have to rebel against it. I don’t have to run from it. I can accept it, embrace it, and I definitely can use it.
What help do you need from him? Have you asked of him? Have you sought out his word for the answers that you need? Have you prayed about it? He is THE help and help is only a prayer away.